Sex Toy Reviews

Review: Lovense Lush 4 wearable vibrator

Kate Sloan

If you ever peruse cam sites or amateur porn sites, you’ve probably seen the Lovense Lush around. It’s a favorite of many online sex workers, because of how well Lovense’s long-distance technology works: once this little pink vibe is inside you, you can connect it to the Lovense app and cede control of the toy to someone far away, whether that’s a friend, a partner, or a customer who’s paid for the privilege.

Lovense’s many other offerings are great too – I’ve reviewed several! – but the Lush seems to be their most popular. So, needless to say, I was intrigued when Lovense reached out and asked if I’d like to review the latest iteration of this bestselling toy, the Lush 4. It launched today, but I’ve been testing it for a couple weeks now. Let me give you the lowdown on how this cult-fave toy has been updated!

Lush 3 (left) and Lush 4 (right)

How does the Lush 4 compare to the Lush 3?

  • The Lush 4’s clitoral arm is shaped differently, having more of an arrowhead/diamond shape than the rounder one on the 3, and is also slightly larger, so it can cover more real estate.
  • The Lush 4 offers rapid charging: charge it for just 5 minutes and you’ll get 1 hour of play. (Charging for a full 50 minutes, however, gets you up to 6 hours of play.)
  • There is a stylish “decorative electroplated piece” on the outside of the Lush 4’s clitoral arm, which (optionally) lights up with different-colored LED lights depending on the vibration mode you’re on, to give both partners a visual indicator of what the vibrator is doing at any given time.
  • The Lush 4’s neck is slightly thicker and floppier than the one on the 3.
  • The Lush 4 is slightly more expensive ($129 currently) than the Lush 3 ($119).

Other than those differences, the two models are quite similar: they have the same motor, their internal/G-spot arm is identical, and they’re both waterproof and relatively quiet.

Lush 3 (left) and Lush 4 (right)

Things I like about the Lovense Lush 4

  • I’ve come to expect fantastic vibrations from Lovense toys, and the Lush 4 delivers. Its vibrations are satisfyingly rumbly, and the app gives you extremely precise control over the vibe’s wide range of available intensities. My G-spot feels massaged and stroked by these vibrations, not at all irritated like it sometimes does with weak or buzzy vibes.
  • Speaking of my G-spot, this toy hits it with aplomb, just as the previous Lush did. Its contoured shape narrows to a rounded protrusion which presses against that spot with ease. I do have to readjust it sometimes to keep it where I want it (more on that later), but when it’s properly situated, it’s extremely stimulating.
  • The Lush 4 is frequently marketed as a vibrator you can wear under your clothes for discreet public play, and unlike almost all other vibes of which this is true, the Lush 4 is actually well-suited to the task. It’s quiet, comfortable even when worn for a few hours at a time, stays put relatively well if you’re wearing close-fitting underwear, and maintains its Bluetooth connection with impressive consistency. One word of warning, though: disable the LED lights in the Lovense app before using it in public, lest your waitress ask you why the hell your underwear is glowing! (I’d imagine folks with photosensitive epilepsy would want to disable this function, too.)
  • I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about those LED lights, but they’re a cool addition. As the partner controlling the vibe but not wearing it, it can sometimes be tricky to tell what exactly is going on, especially if your partner isn’t very vocal – but the lights change as you alter the vibrations, giving you a visual indicator of what your partner might be feeling. It’s not the most intuitive or informative display, but it’s something. And you can turn it off in the settings of the app if you don’t like it.
  • As ever, I’m impressed by Lovense’s connectivity, its app, and the many things you can do therein. Over the course of just one testing session, for example, I was able to control the toy myself in the app, send a link to a long-distance sweetheart to control it, and even sync up the vibrations with music. (Lush Life might be a good choice, for self-evident reasons… or perhaps something bassy and rhythmic, like the Shower Song?)
  • While it still doesn’t provide as much clitoral stimulation as I want/need (more on that below), the Lush 4 at least provides more clit stim than its predecessor, because its external arm is shaped in such a way that more vibration is transmitted to my clit. Still not enough for me to get off from, though.
  • The rapid charging function is quite useful, especially for this type of vibe, where you might impulsively decide to grab it right before a dinner date (for instance) and would be disappointed to find it dead. Just plug it in for five minutes – while you do your makeup or brush your teeth, say – and it’ll have enough juice for an hour of use.
  • It’s waterproof! Hurrah!

Things I don’t like about the Lovense Lush 4

  • As with the other Lushes that came before it, the Lush 4 offers very little in the way of clitoral stimulation. To be fair, it’s not really aiming for that; Lovense’s own website even suggests that you pair your Lush 4 with their Ferri panty vibe if you want clit stim. But since the majority of vulva-havers enjoy clit stim and need it to reach orgasm, and since the external arm of the Lush makes it a bit challenging to slot a clit vibe into that area too, I do always wish that the Lush directed more vibrations onto my clit and not just my G-spot, so that I could get off from it. As is, it’s a fun tease that I really enjoy, but that’s it.
  • It’s subtle, but I’m pretty sure the neck of the Lush 4 is slightly floppier/bendier than the neck of the Lush 3, which (for my particular anatomy, anyway) means that the 4 is a bit more prone to sliding around inside me and doesn’t always stay exactly on my G-spot, especially if I’m moving around a lot. I had to manually readjust it a bit more, which could be annoying if you’re using it in public/trying to be discreet.
Lush 3 (left) and Lush 4 (right)

Final thoughts

Q. Is the Lush 4 worth buying?

A. If you want a G-spot vibrator, yes! If you want a vibrator you can comfortably and discreetly wear for public play, yes! If you want a vibrator that can be controlled by a long-distance partner (or customer), yes!

Q. What about if I need/want clitoral stimulation?

A. Alas, you won’t get much of it from the Lush 4. If I want to reach orgasm with this toy, I have to nudge its external arm aside to make room for a separate clitoral vibe. The vibrations which transmit into the Lush’s clitoral arm just aren’t enough to get me off on their own. If you want something that’s similar but more clit-focused, I’d suggest the wonderful Ferri panty vibe or the We-Vibe-esque Dolce.

Q. Should I upgrade to the Lush 4 if I already own a Lush 3?

A. Probably not, unless you think that the LED light display or rapid charging feature would make a big difference for you. Either one (or both) of those might make an upgrade worthwhile. Aside from that, I don’t think it’s changed enough that you need to upgrade.

Q. Can I control your vibe?!

A. No, that privilege is only extended to a very, very lucky few. You know who you are. 😘

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Wuzz Eli tongue-like vibrator

Kate Sloan

What is the Wuzz Eli?

This cute rechargeable vibrator from sex toy brand Wuzz is meant to feel like oral sex: its twisty silicone tip is shaped like a (small) human tongue, and it bends and flexes like one, too. It’s mainly designed for clitoral stimulation, though you can insert it shallowly to stimulate the sensitive vaginal opening and inner labia as well.

It’s made of silicone and ABS plastic, has 4 speeds and 6 patterns, and its battery lasts for about 100 minutes on a 1-hour charge. It retails for $89 USD on Amazon or on Wuzz’s website.

Bendy AF!

Things I like about the Wuzz Eli

  • The shape, size, thickness, and pliability of the Eli’s tongue-shaped tip makes it actually feel like a tongue, provided that it’s well-lubed and has warmed to body temperature. I love pairing this toy with oral sex fantasies, particularly fantasies about a sex robot programmed to give killer head, because then the vibration makes more sense 😂
  • Furthermore, I love that this toy is so petite and lightweight that I can easily move it around to stimulate different parts of my clit at will – the hood, the sides, etc. – which also makes it feel more tongue-like. I can nudge the tip of the toy into various vulvovaginal nooks and crannies one-handed without trouble, even on days when my hands are sore – and the silicone is flexible enough that it always feels comfortable, never pokey.
  • While this vibe only has 4 steady speeds, they’re all decently rumbly, though they do get buzzier as you turn up the intensity. The Eli isn’t as rumbly as, say, the We-Vibe Tango or tragically-discontinued Dame Kip (RIP), but it’s fairly strong for its size, and is plenty rumbly enough for me – in fact, one time, it even made me come while I was only on the 2nd speed out of 4!
  • It’s waterproof, so you can use it in the shower or bathtub to your heart’s content.
  • It’s relatively quiet – even on its highest speed, I don’t think it could be heard through a closed door in most cases.
  • The Eli comes with its own storage bag to keep lint/dirt off of it during storage or transport. The bag is made of recycled fabric – hooray for sustainability!

Things I don’t like about the Wuzz Eli

  • I always dislike it when a vibrator has only one button that you have to use to cycle through all of its modes, which this one does. It’s annoying and time-consuming to have to flip through all 10 modes to get back to a lower speed, for instance.
  • $89 is a bit more than I’d typically expect to pay for a vibrator like this, which isn’t quite as strong or rumbly as some vibes at comparable price points.

Final thoughts

If you’ve been on the fence about vibrators as a whole because you worry they would feel too obtrusive/conspicuous, you might consider something like the Eli, which delivers vibrations through soft and flexible silicone that can feel more human than mechanical when properly lubed.

Wuzz has repeatedly described their Eli vibe as “beginner-friendly,” but they’ve sidestepped a lot of the issues that tend to plague vibes described this way: the Eli’s motor is actually decently strong and rumbly, and it has no problem getting me off, especially when I stroke it against my clit manually in a tongue-like way.

Indeed, the magic of the Eli really is in its bendy silicone “tongue.” I wish waaaay more companies would experiment with interesting shapes like this, because they really can take the pleasure of vibration to the next level!

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

If You’ve Been Wanting a Fun Factory Toy, Now’s the Time…!

Kate Sloan
Image via Fun Factory

Friends, I don’t mean to alarm you any more than you’re (no doubt) already alarmed right now, but something is amiss with Fun Factory.

Yes, that’s right – this beloved German sex toy company, which has been cranking out whimsically colorful vibrators (among other things) since 1996, might be in jeopardy.

The brand was recently acquired by Satisfyer, another sex toy company. Ever since the acquisition (and for some time before it too, I think), it’s been more difficult to purchase Fun Factory toys, especially in the U.S.: the company’s U.S. shop has been “under reconstruction” for months.

Satisfyer shut down the Fun Factory affiliate program in September, and I’m concerned that they may shut down Fun Factory altogether – or may at least move production away from their German factory, which would result in a lessening of quality. For that reason, I’m recommending that you go ahead and buy any Fun Factory toys you’ve been wanting, because I’m not sure how much longer they’ll be available. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news!

I’ve scoured some of my favorite sex toy retailer affiliates to find the best Fun Factory toys they still have in stock, and gathered them up for you below. I would recommend buying from a reputable retailer like the ones I’m linking to here, rather than from Amazon, because Amazon is known for sending out fakes/knockoffs.

Hope this helps! (And I really, really hope I’m wrong about Satisfyer’s plans for Fun Factory…)

 

Insertable vibrators

Image via Fun Factory

Big Boss G-spot vibrator

Available at:

The Big Boss is Fun Factory’s largest insertable vibrator, and will be adored by size queens/kings/monarchs. But most importantly, it’s got Fun Factory’s signature rumbly-as-fuck motor, with a wide variety of intensities to choose from. And because it has a looped handle, it’s pretty ergonomic to thrust with, whether you’re using it on yourself or a partner. (It’s not anal-safe, however – no flared base!)

Image via Fun Factory

Miss Bi rabbit vibrator

Available at:

The Miss Bi has the same lovely rumbliness as the Big Boss, except it’s a dual-stimulation toy, so your clit can get in on the action too. This rabbit’s bendy clit stimulator allows it to fit a broad range of anatomies, and the arm flexes and moves with you as you thrust the toy. You can even use this toy anally, with the clit arm on your perineum, if you prefer. As ever, I love Fun Factory’s perfectly clicky, responsive buttons, which light up in the dark so they’re easy to find.

 

Penis toys

Image via Fun Factory

Manta penis vibrator

Available at:

The Manta is one of Fun Factory’s most ingenious designs. It consists of flexible silicone “wings” which wrap around the shaft of a penis. You can stroke this toy up and down (when it’s well-lubed), or just hold it on the spot that feels the best; it can also be seamlessly incorporated into a blowjob or handjob any time you want to add some vibration into the mix. I use mine on my partner fairly frequently and love how easy it is to use, even on days when my hands are sore. Oh, and I love how hard it makes them come, too 😉

Cobra Libre II vibrating stroker

Available at:

If you think you’d fancy some rumbly vibration focused on the head of your dick, the Cobra Libre could be just what you need! It also kind of looks like a race car, which is a bonus.

 

We’ll miss you, Fun Factory… Thanks for all that you did for the sex toy industry! 💙

Review: Twisted Beast Marchosias dildo

Kate Sloan

I’ve reviewed a lot of dildos that are meant to look like human cocks, and a lot of dildos that aren’t meant to look like cocks at all – but it’s far less common that I review a dildo which is supposed to look like a cock, just not a human one.

The Twisted Beast Marchosias, which I’m reviewing today, is one such dildo. It’s meant to be canine-esque, with a pointed tip and contoured, “knotted” shape.

As I’ve mentioned here before, bestiality fantasies (even those involving humanoid/anthropomorphized animals) just don’t do it for me, so I usually find these dildos interesting moreso from a psychological and sociological standpoint than from an erotic one. I think they speak to (among other things) the way humans sometimes cloak our sexual desires in order to sidestep sexual shame. You might not feel fully able to have rambunctious, uninhibited sex in all the ways you want to, but a wild animal in heat certainly can – so whether you picture yourself being fucked by an unbridled creature, or being that creature, its archetypally primal nature can alleviate some shame and self-judgment.

As I pondered this while getting myself turned on for an initial testing session with the Marchosias, I realized I didn’t have to disqualify myself from having this type of fantasy just because I’m not into dog dick. Instead, I pictured what it would be like if a human was fucking me, when, unexpectedly to both of us, their cock started to swell at the base, “knotting” inside me and keeping our bodies locked together until the deed was done. I imagine we’d both feel surprised and confused about these events, but at the same time, it’d be a massive turn-on – not only psychologically but physically, since the knot would make the dick feel bigger inside me and would create some compression around the base of the penis, trapping blood inside like a natural cock ring, which would make it all the more sensitive and swollen.

…Okay, I’ll stop with the word-porn now; this is a sex toy review, not werewolf erotica. (Nothin’ wrong with werewolf erotica, it’s just not my bread and butter, honey!) I did want to highlight for you, though, that you don’t have to be a furry, or anything of the sort, to enjoy animalistic dildos like the Marchosias (although I’m sure plenty of furries do enjoy it!). You can always get creative with your fantasies, and a toy like this can make them seem all the more real.

Pictured with a Magic Wand Rechargeable for scale

Customization options, hooray!

The Marchosias is available in four different sizes:

  • Small ($89.95): 7″ insertable length, 2.13″ widest diameter
  • Medium ($169.95): 9″ insertable length, 2.55″ widest diameter
  • Large ($260.95): 11″ insertable length, 3.34″ widest diameter
  • XL ($368.95): 14″ insertable length, 4.14″ widest diameter

I chose the small, because – as is often the case for fantasy dildos like those made by Twisted Beast – it’s not really very small at all! Its dimensions are similar to realistic dildos of porn-star dimensions, except of course that it’s shaped quite differently.

I went with the ombré colorway, because it’s far more unique-looking than the other option, a solid red. The black-to-red fade looks super sleek and cool; I love the way the colors subtly swirl together along the shaft.

Twisted Beast doesn’t offer customization of dildo hardness vs. softness. This one is their standard silicone, which is on the soft-and-squishy side of the spectrum. The company describes it as being comparable to Bad Dragon’s “soft” shore.

Things I like about the Marchosias dildo

  • This is definitely the most comfortable dog-dick dildo I’ve ever tested. (Lord, what a sentence. What would my journalism school professors think of me now?!) Usually the girthy knot will push my vagina’s limits, but this dildo’s knot is much closer in diameter to the rest of the dildo, and is softly rounded off, rather than bulging out at extreme angles. This, combined with the softness of the silicone, makes this toy relatively comfy even when I’m pounding myself with it pretty hard, as long as it’s well-lubed. I don’t feel sore afterward at all, either (which admittedly could be a drawback for people who like that post-penetration ache!).
  • The softness of the silicone also lends a deliciously satisfying quality to my orgasms, like my vag is squeezing a stress ball with each contraction. As I’ve noted before, I think I come harder with toys made of firmer materials, because of the unrelenting pressure they apply to internal erogenous zones – but orgasms with something squishier inside me can be more pleasant, paradoxically, since they don’t knock the wind out of me quite so much.
  • On an aesthetic level, I don’t care whether a dildo has balls or not – but practically speaking, I like that they function as a ‘handle’ for this toy, so I can thrust it by hand without issue even when my pain is flaring up. The balls also make this toy anal-safe and strap-on compatible, so if you’ve ever wanted to fuck your lover up the butt with a dog dick, go nuts.
  • On that note, I never lose track of how the dildo is oriented inside me (as with many other toys) because of the balls and the pentagram (!!) engraved at the base of the toy, which act as visual markers.

Things I don’t like about the Marchosias dildo

  • The pointed tip can be a little uncomfortable when I shove the dildo fully inside me (which long-time readers already know I love to do, haha). It pokes my cervix sometimes, and lacks the firmness and protrusion it would need to consistently be able to slide up into my A-spot, a.k.a. anterior fornix.
  • Like many silicone toys, this one attracts hair/lint/dust like mad (as you can see in these photos!!), so I usually need to wash it off before each use, even if it’s just been stashed in a drawer or on my nightstand in the interim. Mildly annoying but not a huge deal.
Linty balls, anyone?

Final thoughts

“Different strokes for different folks” should be a guiding principle of the sex toy industry – or “different goals for different holes,” if you prefer – and this is illustrated brilliantly by fantasy dildos, such as those made by Twisted Beast. Not only do they offer a variety of physical sensations that a human cock could never (or seldom) replicate; they also invite you to broaden your sexual imagination. Why not fantasize about a sexy werewolf, a charming centaur, or a clueless human who just got dropped into the omegaverse?! Life is short, baby! Expand your mind!

I always try to dip my toes into these fantasies when I’m reviewing a dildo like this, but it’s rare that I’m actually able to enjoy them as much as I did with this one. I think it’s because the Marchosias is so damn comfortable, due to its squishy silicone and its softly contoured design – it allows me to flip back and forth easily between wild fantasies and tamer ones, since the toy feels plausibly like a canine dick or a bulbous human one, like some kind of cocktical illusion.

If this blog were a shitty mainstream magazine, maybe I’d end this review by saying something like, “They say a dog is man’s best friend, and I think this dildo is a woman’s!!” The truth is, though, we’ve all got orifices – and we’ve all got the capacity to fantasize about stuff that’s off the beaten path. If a doggy dildo like the Marchosias has piqued your interest, I’d say you should give it a shot, and don’t let the stigma give you paws. Uh, I mean, pause. 😉

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: FusyFun Wave

Kate Sloan
Image via FusyFun

What is the FusyFun Wave?

I’ve never seen anything quite like this product before… It’s essentially 4 toys in 1: a vibrating butt plug, perineum stimulator, and cock ring, plus a thin bendable ‘arm’ that lies along the top side of the penis shaft during penetrative sex, stimulating the receptive partner’s G-spot or prostate.

In that sense, it’s similar to something like a We-Vibe – except that it’s the penis-owner who wears this one, not the vulva-owner. And because that’s the case, it’s not just meant for vaginal sex – you can use it during anal sex too, which is trickier/less advisable to do with something that lacks a flared base like a We-Vibe.

The overall effect of the FusyFun Wave, then – at least theoretically – is that the ‘top’ will get their prostate stimulated by the vibrating butt plug as they thrust, their boner will be extra-hard because of the constriction provided by the cock ring, and their partner’s G-spot or prostate will be massaged by the vibrator on each thrust. Intrigued? Me fuckin’ too! Read on for my thoughts…

Image via FusyFun

Things I like about the FusyFun Wave

  • This toy’s concept is genuinely quite inventive, and each of its elements works well together. I’m rarely in favor of multi-tasking toys, since I think it’s almost always better to just do one thing and do it right – but the combo of cock ring, butt plug, and perineum stimulator is a great one, and makes penetrative sex even more pleasurable for penis-owners who like prostate/perineal stim.
  • This toy has two motors, each separately controllable. One powers the butt plug and the other powers everything else, although there is a bit of vibration transfer between the two. I love when a multi-motor toy lets you control each one on its own like this, so that you can (for example) still enjoy the anal vibrations while the rest of the toy is shut off, or vice-versa.
  • You can control the Wave in two different ways: either via the button directly on the toy itself, or using the little remote it comes with. The remote is super convenient and means you can change the settings without having to reach all the way down there every time, which would be especially annoying during partnered sex!
  • The motor in the butt plug portion of the toy is surprisingly strong and rumbly! So much so, in fact, that for my partner, it didn’t even matter that the plug isn’t curved – it stimulated her prostate beautifully anyhow, boosting arousal and intensifying orgasms.
  • The cock ring is stretchy enough that it was always comfortable for my partner, whose dick’s on the larger side. (However, as with any cock ring, generally you shouldn’t leave it on for more than 20-30 minutes at a time, tops.)
  • In theory, you could bend the vaginal arm upward so it hits the clit during intercourse instead of the G-spot. (However, as described below, the motor of that part of the toy is extremely buzzy, so I prefer to use a separate, rumblier clitoral vibe for that purpose.)
  • The instruction manual made me laugh, particularly the part that says chatting openly with your partner about your desires is step one of using their product (very true, and rarely addressed by sex toy companies!) and the part that describes two men using this product together for anal sex as being “filled to the brim for him & him.” More sex toys should have funny instruction manuals tbh 😂
  • FusyFun’s customer service was great in the interaction I had with them – there was a battery issue with the remote of the first Wave they sent us, and they sent out a new one as soon as we let them know. Kudos!
Image via FusyFun

Things I don’t like about the FusyFun Wave

  • Unfortunately, one of the worst things about the toy is also one of the most important: the motor that powers the cock ring, the perineum stimulator, and the bendable arm that goes into the vagina. It’s much buzzier and weaker than the prostate-focused motor, so it’s just not very stimulating and can cause some temporary desensitization after a while. That being said, I find buzzy vibration more tolerable on my G-spot than on my clit, especially when there’s motion/thrusting involved.
  • While it’s great that each motor has 9 modes (3 steady speeds followed by 6 patterns), it is annoying that there is only one button to control each, so if you want to get back to a previous setting, you have to either press the button enough times that it loops back around, or just turn the toy off and then on again.
  • My partner felt that they wouldn’t be able to thrust at full speed/intensity because the toy’s vaginal arm could be scrapey or cervix-pokey for me in that case. She also felt that this toy was unsuitable for cowgirl position because the vaginal arm would frequently fall out and need to be readjusted. So, to target the G-spot while using this toy, your best bet is some version of missionary position, thrusting at a slow-to-medium speed/intensity.
  • It only has a 60-minute battery life, although admittedly I wouldn’t tend to expect much better from a dual-motor toy at this price point ($55.90 at the time that I’m writing this!).
  • It’s only splashproof (IPX6), not fully waterproof – so you can wash it in the sink but shouldn’t use it in a bath, pool, etc.

Final thoughts

Who’s the ideal user for the FusyFun Wave? I’d say it’s someone who fits at least one of the following criteria:

  • You or your partner likes prostate vibration and would like to experience it during vaginal and/or anal sex
  • You or your partner likes G-spot vibration and would like to experience it during vaginal sex
  • You already enjoy using vibrating butt plugs, cock rings, and/or perineal stimulators during penetrative sex and would like a singular product that does all of the above, for convenience’s sake
  • You’re a sex toy nerd who collects (or simply curious about) unusual toys

The weak and buzzy external motor and the not-quite-perfected design notwithstanding, this is an interesting vibe that brings something new to the table (or to the bed, as the case may be). Like the We-Vibe and its ilk, the Wave seeks to make penetrative sex more pleasurable for everyone, while allowing you to maintain the intimacy and closeness that many people enjoy about that type of sex. If that sounds like something you’d be into, maybe wave hello to the Wave! 👋 🌊

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.